I am feeling the need to buy statement t-shirts that aren’t like, overtly ‘FUCK YOU MAGA ASSHOLES’, because you know, unlike them, I’m classy; but shirts that leave no question as to where I stand. Nothing that says “FORCED VASECTOMIES FOR ALL” but instead say, “Resist” and instead of saying, “I will kick you in the junk if you even try to get in my face”, something promoting literacy like “I’m with the Banned” with a picture of a shelf of books. “Fueled by Feminist Rage” instead of “You realize this is how you motherfuckers start dying right?” Victorian women with abusive husbands didn’t have them suffer surprise heart attacks at 32, for nothing; we learn from history. I mean if we’re going back to antiquated values, we’re going to employ antiquated means of detaching ourselves from our husbands, if you don’t ALLOW us to live peacefully, don’t expect us to stay peaceful.
There’s a crazy in our neighborhood who will pontificate on how ALL Liberals want to kill all the right wing, and I want to ask him, if you really believe that’s true, why do you think they want to kill you? Maybe in self-defense? I want to wear slogans around town because I don’t want any of them talking to me and I want it known, the ground I stand on. I don’t want to be a collaborator. I don’t intend to hide. Come at me sweetie. I fucking dare you. I am not equipped to go down quietly. I am not conditioned to be complacent. Don’t Tread on Me. I don’t even expect to win in the long run, but I will go down screaming “Fuck You” to all of you. I’m so angry. I’m so, so angry.
I went to an event in my neighborhood last night. A group of women who were afraid, taking comfort in seeing faces that they knew were “safe”. They talked about their fear, and the need to hide now, to remove signs, they felt like targets. They were in despair. How, how could anyone choose a convicted felon, a proud racist, a proud RAPIST and think that was in anyway a sane or reasonable choice for President. To hold the nations secrets, the man who has sold out EVERYONE in his life, for his own gain. How are you all so fucking stupid?! You disgust me. You DISGUST me. How can you think that I as a woman, am less than a man, and should have less rights, and less opportunity. That your WALLET is more important than people’s lives. Especially when you’re too fucking stupid to realize how this is going to wreck everyone but the rich, financially. This wasn’t about liberals versus conservatives, this wasn’t about Democrat vs Republican. This was about basic concepts of humanity. This was: do you have a basic moral center or do you not? Do you have an iota of intelligence, or do you NOT? Do you believe that racism and rapism is bad and should not be rewarded or do you think RAPE is no big deal? And it is shocking how many people have proven that they have no moral compass at all.
We all know what you voted for. You’d rather have a RAPIST than a woman. How are you so ….weak? I cannot deal without how pathetic and weak you all are. How feeble-minded. I despise your weakness, your fear, your cowardice. The rights of your sisters and mothers and friends who will suffer because you want the chaos; because you haven’t gotten yours, you want to burn the world down and you don’t care if you suffer, as long as others suffer more. You’ll happily call yourselves trash to lick the boot that grinds you down, as long as you get to watch others suffer more. You should be French, you’re so willing to debase yourselves to appease a power, you have lost all sight of what it means to be American. Cowards, collaborators, boot-licking surrender monkeys.
I spoke to a neighbor today about a quote floating around the internet, attributed to an aide of Gorbachev who said something to the effect of: “We’re about to do something terrible to you. We’re going to deprive you of an enemy. ” And I don’t know if this is a true attribution or not, but it’s a true sentiment. Without an enemy without, we start to find enemies within. History has shown we’ve always got to be fighting something. We aren’t content to be at peace. To have what we have and work towards what we want, without blaming SOMEONE for what we don’t have. For blaming someone for taking what should be ours. The next tribe over, because we want their water, becomes the next country over because we want their ports, becomes the next continent over because we want their farmland and eventually we’ve gotten all we can get, conflict settles and communication across countries leads to a period of relative calm and defacto peace and suddenly, nobody has a real enemy to fight. And we get … bored.
We start looking at the enemies who are living right next door. Living their lives, but … living it wrong. The wrong color, the wrong orientation, the ones who aren’t living life like you know it should be lived. Different. Ew. How dare I be forced to see other people living lives I don’t agree with! Hasn’t history shown, without an enemy to fight without, we will hunt the enemy within. And down the rabbit hole we go, again and again. We fought one Civil War over whether White Men could own people as property, and now we’re going to have another fight over whether White Men can own people as property. I mean we sure learned didn’t we?
I want to wear a shirt. I want people to know, I wasn’t with them. I wasn’t this fucking stupid. I knew. They knew. We all knew. And I want to wear the Scarlet A, I want to wear “Resist” emblazoned across my chest. But I’m … really tired. And god, I think political branding merch is just so … tacky. And I sneer when I see people wearing MAGA hats, because aligning yourself like a walking billboard for a presidential candidate is just… uhg. Hon, it’s giving desperate girl energy. You’re in a cult. All this shit is really weird. You aren’t a collection of people bound by a common set of values, you’re all just weird little Stans. You dress yourself as garbage and call yourselves PROUD to be a man’s trash. Proud! To be Trash for a man.
Your grandparents are rolling in their graves for how you debase yourselves for this man. They fought to be given respect and you toss it away without a thought to thank those who fought all their lives for every inch of ground gained. Just to be treated as equal. You are foul. You are self-hating vipers, who will drag everyone down, just so you can feel superior, just once in your pathetic, debased existence. Sorry, you didn’t have what it takes to earn it, honey, but that’s hardly the fault of women who are better than you, any more than it’s the fault of men who are better than you. Why does it burn you so badly, when it’s WOMEN who are better than you? Why is that so much worse?
Oh I despise you all. I despise what you stand for and I despise what you’ve done. You’ve won, yes. You do, time and time again and the wheel spends round again. But we learn a little each time. We retain a little bit more. And we fight a little bit harder, because we know it can happen, because it’s happened before. And one day, we will win. Maybe not this go round, but eventually one day, we’re going to win. So why not just knock your king over know. You’ll be checkmated in one move or two, or maybe three from now, but one day it will happen. Can’t we just call the game now. One day, you will lose. You always do. So just say, “This shit isn’t worth my life” suck it up and accept that everyone here on this planet is stuck in the consequences of the confluence of their choices and their circumstances. You were born who you were in life, with a particular set of abilities and handicaps. And someone’s going to be better than you in everything you’re ever going to do in your life and someone’s going to be worse. It’s just life and everyone is just trying to fucking get through it. There are no enemies, lurking in the woods, trying to take whats yours. They will let you be, if you just. let. them. be. too. I am so mad, I’m going mad.
When are we going to be better than this?